KENNESAW, GA–Kennesaw State University will merge with Southern Polytechnic State in agreement that college degrees are absolutely still a thing that people do. The resulting institution made its intentions clear with a press release this morning.
SPSUKSU, (Spsook’ – soo), would like to remind the families of high school graduates who have sufficient savings or credit that college degrees are absolutely still a thing. Seriously. I mean, you know. Just look at all these brick buildings we have. That’s gotta count for something.
In a nod to the SPSU mascot, Sting, KSU’s former mascot Scrappy the Owl will transform into a mutated freak of nature, Scrappy the Stinging Owl, whose mighty poison can infect business majors with an odd desire to attend STEM classes, possibly even minoring in something scienceish.