Justin Bieber’s Atlanta Move Protested by Wealthiest 1%’s Staff

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Rich Guy Somehow Not Welcome in Rich Neighborhood

BUCKHEAD, ATLANTA–Pop star and wealth amasser Justin Bieber is somehow not welcome in Atlanta’s ritziest neighborhood, according to a protest this morning. Wealthy homeowners of the Buckhead neighborhood sent their staff into the streets to deliver their message of discomfort with the pop star.

Textiles baron Tensington Wentworth IV ordered his chief butler Heimsler to protest Bieber’s move to the neighborhood with a placard fashioned from mahogany and Italian leather. Heimsler arrived at the protest site this morning astride a white charger. Both wore monocles.

The leather sign was carefully embossed with the words “No Bieber Neighbor” in gold leaf, and is valued at well over $100,000. When asked for comment, Heimsler merely frowned at reporters. The horse gnashed its teeth and stomped in irritation at being looked at directly by working people.

Also in attendance was the chief steward of Goerings Downs, the Buckhead mansion which is the residence of Lady Lucretia Flipsbottom. The chief steward, Zweiss, arrived by platinum-plated helicopter, bringing with him a hedge intertwined with rare flowers which spelled the words “Bieber Go Home (Not Here).”

Other notable staff of Atlanta’s wealthiest held gold placards, engraved overnight in Switzerland and flown by jet across the Atlantic.

Mr. Bieber was unavailable for comment, and there is no word at this time regarding whether or not he will still move to the area.