Clogged City Storm Drains and Transit Issues Solved By New In-Town Waterway

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PHOTO: Tim Pierce

ATLANTA, GA–City planners are rejoicing this morning after a particularly large volume of rainfall from a single storm overflowed ancient drainage systems, turning highways into canals.

“It’s a two-birds-one-stone proposition for us,” said Huck Fen, city planning office media representative. “We don’t have to worry about fixing storm drainage or traffic problems. And we’re looking forward to some sweet kickbacks from the canoe lobbyists.”

Saying that in the coming years Atlanta would be known as the “Venice of America But Not Las Vegas,” Fen described plans for small boat rental, known as the Park And Paddle. “We were seriously sweating the prospect of fixing the city’s drainage, not to mention all this transit reform business. But we have a new slogan around the office: ‘Water We Worrying About?'”