Douglasville Man Accidentally Attends Church Sunday After Easter

Churchey church chuch. Yeah! PHOTO: Linuxerist

DOUGLASVILLE–Farley R. Lijous, unemployed paint agitator and father of two, discovered to his surprise Sunday that he had mistakenly attended church the week after Easter. Lijous disclosed to reporters that while he considers himself a religious man, he normally only attends church for what he called “the Big Four.” Those are: Christmas, Easter, weddings and [...]

City Celebrates St. Patrick’s Day Because Beer

St. Patrick clutching a sixer.

ATLANTA–Our fair city is drawing breath today to begin celebrating the history of St. Patrick, some kind of a priest or something, in remembrance of his great contributions because beer. Holy shit, so many beers. Harvey Notherwan, Professor of United Kingdom at Emory, confirmed that St. Patrick’s day holds particular significance for Atlantans. “Oh yes, [...]