State of Georgia Resorts to Heartbroken Volvo Vaguebooking

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ATLANTA, GA–The state of Georgia was spurned this week by Swedish auto manufacturer Volvo despite a lengthy and involved courtship. Georgia hoped to win Volvo’s affection over rival South Carolina, but at the last minute Volvo made clear its intentions to go with the Palmetto state.

Saddened and hurt by Volvo’s decision, State of Georgia officials took to social media to post vague bits of depressed thoughts, a practice known as “vaguebooking.” Also posted were bits of song lyrics that clearly meant a lot to the State of Georgia, but were unknown and a bit sappy to many readers.

“You never know, when you hold a rose, how hard its thorns can be,” read one such post, said to have been composed by the state’s communication office.

The communication office couldn’t be reached for comment, merely stating “No. We’re fine. We’re fine,” despite selfies showing that they were, in fact, crying and not fine at all.