Second Grader Claims Playground Shoving Justified Because “Chemical Weapons”

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It's a great reason to do anything! PHOTO: Bart Everson

ATLANTA–Second grade student Cody Barksdale, 7, is facing a note home to his parents and possible detention for a playground scuffle this weekend which he says began over his classmate Brandon Pyle’s possession of chemical weapons.

Pyle, a part time Pokemon enthusiast aged 7 years, vehemently denies allegations of chemical weapon use, saying Barksdale fabricated the story to justify his own aggression.

“I was just standing there, and Cody pushed me down for no reason,” said Pyle. When authorities pointed out that Pyle demonstrated no ability to be still at any other time during his life, Pyle restated his position that he was just standing.

Barksdale, upon hearing Pyle’s defense, demanded he be allowed to retort, saying “Not unh! And anyway, uh, chemical weapons!”

Authorities involved in the incident refused comment, but seemed to this reporter to be indifferent to the causes of the violence so long as it stopped. As a temporary measure, involved parties were separated, with Barksdale facing possible further sanctions from his parents.