Lynchburg, TN—Representatives from Jack Daniel’s announced Monday that they will be introducing a new flavor of whiskey inspired by the all-American attitude of T.G.I. Friday’s. The new flavor, called T.G.I. Whiskey, will supposedly incorporate everything that makes T.G.I. Friday’s so popular: salt, flare, Tuscan spinach dip, flavor-loaded potato skins and, most of all, attitude.
“Our flavor scientists worked around the clock with Jack Daniel’s to find a way to distill the feeling you get when you see a bunch of goofy knick knacks and shit all over the wall into a distinct flavor, and we think we finally got it,” said Ryan Tyrell, Chief Innovation Dude with T.G.I. Friday’s. “Totally nailed it, brah.”
While not available to the public yet, T.G.I. Whiskey has already competed in several festivals. “It has a distinct opening note of mediocrity and nachos that is quickly followed by hints of deep-fried self-despair and buffalo sauce with delicate undertones of suburbia,” said Jerry Kenny, a tasting judge at the 2012 San Francisco World Spirits Competition. “Highly recommended.”
T.G.I. Whiskey will arrive in suburban liquor stores in early May. Limited edition bottles with a fried green bean in the bottom will also be available for the first month.