Georgia drivers must now pass No-Win Scenario Test for license

0
2310
Dammit, Jim, these are not the droids you're looking for.

ATLANTA–Georgia Republicans voted early Monday to move forward with new requirements that will require drivers to take the Kobayashi Maru in order to renew their drivers license.  The Kobayashi Maru is a “no win” scenario test in the fictional Star Trek universe designed to test the character of cadets in the command track at Starfleet Academy.  Residents must display to clerks at the DMV how they will behave in a truly hopeless situation.

Some of the test elements include waiting in line for indeterminate periods of time, exposure to apathetic low level local government employees and the illogical belief that your state-recognized identity has a 5 year shelf life.

“With the decrease in science education, some lawmakers believe the internal combustion engine to be just as magical as a fictional starship,” said Professor Walter P.P. Kellerman of Emory University. “These increasingly ludicrous requirements are an attempt to keep this advanced technology out of the hands of illegal immigrants.”

Other high tech, forward-thinking requirements by the state include mailing yourself an empty envelope so have a piece of mail to prove your address and presenting a birth certificate to prove that you haven’t shapeshifted into another person over the past 5 years.