Former Lovers Wage Bliss War via Condo Facebook Page

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Happier times. PHOTO: Rachel Carter

ATLANTA–A former couple is waging a bitter passive aggressive bliss war via their Brookhaven condo association Facebook page. Jake Siffard and Maria Chundle, previously known by their couple name “Siffdle,” dissolved their romantic partnership in March, citing “irreconcilable differences” and “assholeness” respectively.

“We just grew apart, I guess,” said Siffard. “These things happen.”

“He’s an asshole,” said Chundle.

The couple’s bliss war involves posting photos of themselves smiling in social settings, or posing with attractive members of the opposite sex in order to appear to be enjoying the single life.

“I don’t know why we do this to one another,” said Siffard. “Everyone knows dating sucks balls. Still, I can’t stop now.”

As for why the condo association’s Facebook page is the chosen battleground, Chundle wasn’t sure.

“I guess because we know neither of us is going to unsubscribe from it,” she said. “We can hide each other, but not the condo’s page. You know, in case the recycling guy is gonna be late or someone sees a weird person in the parking lot.”