Atlanta's Serious News Hole
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GRADY HOSPITAL — Atlas J. Constance, former television journalist, was admitted to Grady hospital on Tuesday. Discovered passed out at his computer early Monday and rushed to the ER by his wife, his symptoms weren’t life threatening. Their cause had doctors baffled… once they finally admitted him. Reporters spoke with Constance in his hospital bed [...]
PONCEY HIGHLANDS — For most of us, New Year’s Eve is a time for happiness. It is a time to gather together with good friends, a time to reflect on the year passed and the one to come. If one plays one’s cards right, it might even be a time to parlay the mood of [...]
ATLANTA, GA — The City of Atlanta has a novel approach to the needs of its citizen’s brains. Legislation has been adopted that will allow the privatization of zombie activities within the city limits. A new company, Munchin’ Solutions, doing business as BRAINSAtlanta, has purchased the sole rights to Atlantan brains at an annual guarantee of [...]
CAPITOL — Georgia lawmakers met today to begin talks about a new bill that could see the Governor’s desk by early next year. The state, having recently banned cell phone use for drivers operating a motor vehicle, would allow residents willing to pay a monthly fee to continue using cell phones while driving. Herman Winkenter, [...]
STONE MOUNTAIN VILLAGE — Stone Mountain released a statement today to announce that they wouldn’t mind a little occupation, as long as people are occupying things. “We understand that the Occupy Atlanta protesters have been asked to leave the downtown Atlanta area, and we would like to extend our lovely Stone Mountain Village as an [...]
SHADES, GA — New homeowner and recent burglary victim Joe Kepler purchased his house just over three months ago in the Shades neighborhood south of Atlanta. Once a thriving community which sprang up around a toilet handle manufacturing plant, the neighborhood has fallen on hard times, but is poised to make a comeback according to [...]
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